You’re ready for a change. You’ve thought it through, your head is all in – but somehow, you’re not moving forward.
Sound familiar?

Chances are, your inner resistance is at play.
And here’s the important part: it’s not sabotaging you out of spite. It’s trying to protect you.

Understanding this is key – because once you do, you can work with it, instead of against it.

Change Always Triggers Stress, Even Small Ones

Every change, big or small, creates a certain level of stress.
Trying a new dish at a restaurant you’ve never had before? That’s a tiny adventure. For a moment, you’re out of control.
Will I like it? Will I react badly to a spice? What if I make a face or have to send it back?

That’s when inner resistance shows up – sometimes called an “inner saboteur.” But it’s not your enemy. It wants the best for you. It’s trying to avoid embarrassment, discomfort, or risk.

And if even trying a new meal can trigger that response, imagine how strong the resistance becomes when the change is bigger – like switching jobs, setting boundaries, or changing habits.

Sometimes it gets so loud that we convince ourselves we don’t need change at all.
“I’m fine the way things are.”
“It’s not worth the trouble.”

Recognizing the Inner Saboteur

The first important step is to recognize that resistance is happening.
Most of us don’t notice it, because these patterns have become second nature. They often come from two main sources:

1. Learned Rules and Beliefs from Childhood

• “Duty first, then me.”

• “If I speak up now, there’ll be consequences.”

• “Always be perfect.”

• “Push through, no matter what.”

2. Personal Experiences and Self-Judgments

• “I don’t really deserve that.”

• “I probably can’t pull it off.”

• “Others are better at this than me.”

These beliefs can be useful in the right context. But when they no longer fit your current life – they start to hold you back.

Example: “Duty First, Then Me”

Maybe as a child, you had to finish your homework before you could play. Or eat your vegetables before you got dessert. That made sense then.

But now, in adult life, you might be applying the same rule to your job, your relationships, your family, your commitments – always putting everything and everyone else first.

And suddenly, there’s no time or space left for you.

The truth? Your life has changed. But the old belief hasn’t.

Bringing Awareness Creates Choice

When you become aware of these patterns, you can begin to shift them.
Start by asking yourself:

1. Does this way of thinking still serve me?

2. Is it still appropriate for the life I’m living now?

3. Where is it helping me – and where is it holding me back?

4. Can I allow myself to make case-by-case exceptions?

5. What’s the worst that could actually happen if I act differently this time?

6. What would my life look like if I no longer followed this belief?

These questions create space between your impulse and your action – and that space is where real change begins.

You’re not ignoring your resistance. You’re listening to it, understanding it, and then deciding consciously:
Is this still true for me? Or is it time for something else?

Conclusion: Work With Yourself, Not Against

Change doesn’t happen by fighting yourself.
It happens when you pause, listen, and decide with clarity.

Your inner resistance isn’t the enemy. It’s a part of you that once had a reason – but maybe it’s time to update that story.

So the next time you feel stuck, don’t force your way through.
Instead, ask: What part of me is trying to protect me right now? And what do I actually need?

Because sometimes, the only thing standing between you and your next step – is an old belief that just wants to be seen.